Just Another Post
As you can see, it's been awhile since I've posted to the blog. It has been an eventful year so far, though. Some good, some bad.
Of course, my big brother Greg passed away in April. It was a shock to the whole family. He was only 44. Those of you who know me well may know that I also lost my other brother in a car accident many, many years ago. So, I know from experience that the pain never really goes away. It gets a little easier to deal with, day by day, for the most part. And then some days, you see or hear something that brings back a memory, and you feel it all full force again, and it just completely catches you off guard. Like, a couple of weeks ago, I was sorting through things in my office and found a birthday card that I had bought for him. I had honestly forgotten all about it (yes, I have great organizational skills!). But when I found it and started looking at it, I remembered buying it ahead of time, being all proud for not waiting until the last minute, and thinking how funny he would think it was. He had such a great sense of humor. He was really a clown. He was so kind and giving. And he was tough! He was my big brother. How can he really be gone? Even now I sometimes read or hear something and think of sharing it with Greg or wonder what he'll think about it - and then I remember. Sometimes I dream about him -- really good, happy dreams. And then I wake up, and I'm a little disoriented for awhile, and then reality sinks in.
Yes, it still hurts a lot. And I still have a hard time talking about it. Even just typing this is really bring up a lot of emotion. So, I'll move on for now, except just to say thank you to everyone who has expressed their condolences, who has said a kind word or shared a memory about my brother, or just let me know that me and my family were in their thoughts and prayers. It means a lot. It's not so much what you say, it's just knowing that people care.
On a more positive note, after 8 years with my previous, rather large employer, I have just started a new job. Like my previous job, this one is network security related, but its a much, smaller organization which I think will suit me a lot better, and the product is actually quite different. Also, its an opportunity to get back into primarily Java development, which was not something I was really able to do any more in my role at the previous job. As a general rule, I don't tend to talk directly about my work or employer on my blog, just because I don't ever want to have to deal with any impression that I'm speaking in any way for my employer on this blog. This blog is all mine. :) If you really care to know particulars, you can hit me up on LinkedIn, or even Facebook or MySpace. Suffice it to say that I am really enjoying the new challenge and have met a lot of friendly and hard working people.
One more thing I should mention. Though I don't post directly to this blog all that frequently as of late, I do post short messages to Twitter (see the upper right corner on the blog) pretty frequently, sometimes 2 or 3 times a day. Nothing profound, sometimes just mundane updates on whatever I'm doing, sometimes random outbursts directed at no one in particular about something that's aggravating me. You can always see the most recent of these updates in the upper right corner of my blog page, or if you want more instant updates, check out my Twitter's site and see all the ways you can follow my updates. (For instance, you can get updates on instant messenger or even SMS).
That's all for now!
Of course, my big brother Greg passed away in April. It was a shock to the whole family. He was only 44. Those of you who know me well may know that I also lost my other brother in a car accident many, many years ago. So, I know from experience that the pain never really goes away. It gets a little easier to deal with, day by day, for the most part. And then some days, you see or hear something that brings back a memory, and you feel it all full force again, and it just completely catches you off guard. Like, a couple of weeks ago, I was sorting through things in my office and found a birthday card that I had bought for him. I had honestly forgotten all about it (yes, I have great organizational skills!). But when I found it and started looking at it, I remembered buying it ahead of time, being all proud for not waiting until the last minute, and thinking how funny he would think it was. He had such a great sense of humor. He was really a clown. He was so kind and giving. And he was tough! He was my big brother. How can he really be gone? Even now I sometimes read or hear something and think of sharing it with Greg or wonder what he'll think about it - and then I remember. Sometimes I dream about him -- really good, happy dreams. And then I wake up, and I'm a little disoriented for awhile, and then reality sinks in.
Yes, it still hurts a lot. And I still have a hard time talking about it. Even just typing this is really bring up a lot of emotion. So, I'll move on for now, except just to say thank you to everyone who has expressed their condolences, who has said a kind word or shared a memory about my brother, or just let me know that me and my family were in their thoughts and prayers. It means a lot. It's not so much what you say, it's just knowing that people care.
On a more positive note, after 8 years with my previous, rather large employer, I have just started a new job. Like my previous job, this one is network security related, but its a much, smaller organization which I think will suit me a lot better, and the product is actually quite different. Also, its an opportunity to get back into primarily Java development, which was not something I was really able to do any more in my role at the previous job. As a general rule, I don't tend to talk directly about my work or employer on my blog, just because I don't ever want to have to deal with any impression that I'm speaking in any way for my employer on this blog. This blog is all mine. :) If you really care to know particulars, you can hit me up on LinkedIn, or even Facebook or MySpace. Suffice it to say that I am really enjoying the new challenge and have met a lot of friendly and hard working people.
One more thing I should mention. Though I don't post directly to this blog all that frequently as of late, I do post short messages to Twitter (see the upper right corner on the blog) pretty frequently, sometimes 2 or 3 times a day. Nothing profound, sometimes just mundane updates on whatever I'm doing, sometimes random outbursts directed at no one in particular about something that's aggravating me. You can always see the most recent of these updates in the upper right corner of my blog page, or if you want more instant updates, check out my Twitter's site and see all the ways you can follow my updates. (For instance, you can get updates on instant messenger or even SMS).
That's all for now!
posted by eric at
6/16/2008 09:01:00 PM
2 Comments
